Obviously you care, but perception is reality.

There are a lot of ways to show you care. The challenging part is slowing down for a few minutes each day to focus on what has proven to be one of the most powerful forms of marketing (showing gratitude), and that is Appreciation Marketing®.

Personal experiences in both my business and personal life have driven me to slow down each day and focus on the one thing really matters in life: relationships.

Joy, happiness and prosperity always lived in the future for me and I had a difficult time bringing them to the present moment. I never felt a sense of fulfillment and it affected all areas of my life

The reality is that we can have it all NOW. There’s a two-part formula, and you can’t expect a positive result without blending the both of them.

The two things we can control are 1) our thoughts and 2) our efforts. Being conscious of the NOW and giving the gift of the present moment requires effort. How are you doing in the area of showing that you care? The marketplace votes with its wallet and spouses vote with their hearts.

The little things add up. The next time you’re speaking to someone in person, refrain from glancing at your phone or looking over his or her shoulder. Remember the last time someone did that to you? It makes you feel insignificant and suggests that they don’t care, doesn’t it?

It’s human nature for us to be drawn to acceptance. When someone appreciates us, we give more attention in that direction. This is true in both our business and our personal lives. It’s easy to point fingers and place blame on what looks to be the issue on the surface. The root of the issue could be that you aren’t showing that you truly do care.

When you show people you care, and you do it in a way that makes an impact, it makes you stand out and be remembered. Whether it’s your spouse, children, customers, or employees, be conscious of how you are (or aren’t) showing them you care. It can be as simple as looking him/her in the eyes and just being in the moment and actually listening when having a conversation.

As you launch into a new year, I’m sure you have big goals and are looking to move fast. I want to personally challenge you to make a New Year’s resolution: slow down in order to speed up.

Slow down a bit, and focus more on what feeds your company (your customers), focus on your employed community (those who allow your vision to be a reality), and focus more on your family (the reason why you do what you do).

Remember, the best investment we can make is in relationships, because relationships are the real currency in life.

Curtis Lewsey is founder of AMcards.com and co-author of Appreciation Marketing®: How to Achieve Greatness Through Gratitude. missiondreambig.com

Personally, the question makes me thing about the “next level” of top-of-mind awareness (TOMA). TOMA is when people automatically think of you when a certain topic arises. For example, when I hear something about the New England Patriots, I instantly think about my friend Brian Kryzanski. My good friend Jim Kohn has earned TOMA for multiple things  . . . restaurants, bourbon, BMW, and Jamaica to name a few.

Clearly, though, you’d like to earn TOMA with the people you know when it comes to your business. If you are a REALTOR® then you’d love it if all the people within your “circle of influence” would instinctively think about you when its time to buy or sell a house – and would also refer you to their circles.

But the “Who’s Your Daddy?” syndrome is the ultimate plane of business success.

Bob McIntosh (Frontline Electric) is not an electrician. He’s my electrician.

Mike Tegeler (Tegeler Insurance) is not just an insurance agent. He’s my insurance agent.

When I have a heating and cooling situation, Pete Galasso (PG & Son) is my HVAC superhero.

Of course I could go on and on. These people have earned my business by being more than professionals at what they do. They know me, they like me, they appreciate me, and they appreciate my business. At least I think so! I trust them completely and am 100% comfortable calling on them when I need their help and will refer them every single time. Because of who they are, I’m their customer for life.

What’s funny is that there are several people (and places) I do business with who have not done anything special to earn my trust and loyalty. And they’ll only be on my payroll until somebody else comes along and does.

We all earn that “next level TOMA” with somebody to some degree. The secret is not necessarily to identify who YOUR daddy is. Its to prove to everybody else how grateful you would be to be theirs.

Are you expendable?

To a kid, especially a boy, that usually meant being a wimp and letting somebody get away with something. Clint Eastwood would ride into town with his cheroot and his pancho and exact his revenge on all the bad guys. I’m supposed to let them all off the hook? I never understood.

We live in a society – especially now with all the reality TV garbage – that glamorizes an eye for an eye. “Revenge is sweet,” and “payback’s a bitch!”

So what about this “high road” stuff? What is it, and why would anybody want to take it?

Somebody has done something nasty to you. You have this pit in your stomach and you can’t stop thinking about it. You’re consumed with negative feelings, anger, and even depression. You want justice.

Today’s easy way out is to lash back on social media. Bad move.

The Appreciation Marketing expert practices taking the high road. And, trust me, it takes a lot of self control.

It sounds like the sissy’s way out, but consider  that no matter how badly someone has wronged you – there’s no amount of revenge that can undo their transgressions. No good can come of your revenge. Only more hurtfulness. Sure, you may feel a sense of satisfaction, and it might even make you feel like Clint Eastwood in front of your friends, but it will always do more harm than good.

If your goal is to “feel better” or gain a personal satisfaction, then take some pride in the fact that you were big enough and strong enough to travel that “high road.” When you laugh at the bully, you disempower him (or her).

I know, your situation is different. Somebody really wronged you and you feel justified in paying them back. Well guess what? I’ve been betrayed too. I’ve been stolen from, lied to, mislead, and gossiped about too; all unjustly. Don’t think I haven’t plotted and fantasized about recompense. I’m human too!

My favorite line from my favorite movie (Casablanca) is where the sleazy local crook, played by Peter Lorre, sits down with Rick (Humphrey Bogart) and says, “You despise me, don’t you Rick?” Without hesitation, Bogey fires back, “If I ever gave you a thought, I probably would.”

Acid destroys the container in which it is stored. Victory is the supreme vengeance in life.

There’s this thing they call karma. If you react with vengeance and fury, you can bet that the same negative forces will push back against you. If you react with kindness and forgiveness, the world will sit up and take notice and karma will pay you back in kind. (Not to mention the karma that will visit the person who wronged you).

Let it go! That jerk who deserves your wrath doesn’t even exist in your world! Weak people revenge. Strong people forgive.

Which one will you be?